Surviving the Holiday's!

If you are like most people the holidays hit and we tend to eat an extra 650 calories a day! Which adds up to about 6 to 15 pounds by mid January! Shocking! I know, but we want to still enjoy the holidays. I have a plan to help me through the holidays. I'll let you know how it works out in January. Here's my plan. I am going to plan what I am going to eat before I get to a party. We all tend to know what our family is going to make at different parties. I am going to write it down even if I blew it! Because being accountable will help you not to over indulge even more. For some reason we hate to write those extra items down but really who are you hiding it from? Your self? I am going to exercise even on Christmas and Christmas eve. If I have to get up early to do it I will. I will not have high expectations of weight loss for this month I will just try not to gain. I will allow my self to enjoy some of my favorite treats like Jeanies homemade chocolates they are to die for! I will not deprive my self of the holiday festivities but will not eat treats every day! I will still eat healthy food allowing room for indulgence on Christmas and Christmas eve and new years eve! The holidays are not a time of food but a time to enjoy your loved ones. I will not eat junk unless i really love it. How often do we find ourselves eating something we really don't like just because its there? I know I catch my self doing that a lot. So here is the the plan broken down.

1. I will write down all food even movie popcorn and chocolate.

2. I will exercise 5 to 6 days a week. even on Christmas!

3. I will only eat things that I love. And only on that holiday occasion.

4. I will enjoy my time with family and remember its not about the food.

5. I will plan out my food that I'm going to eat for the rest of the time even though I will be out of town and at some one elses house.

6. I will not stress about weight loss just maintain.

7. I will not beat myself up for any mistakes i make I will let go and move on.

So there it is. Happy holiday's to all of you! And those that are working on weight loss good luck and you can do it!

There is so much in my life I am greatful for!

I am grateful for my family. I get to see my beautiful children every day. I have a hard working husband who goes out everyday to make our lives better. I am grateful for my body it lets me do things that I never imagined I could ever do. I thank god often for giving me this body in which I neglected for years. I now show much respect for a body that can get up every day and work hard and run miles on end. A body that heals quickly from injury and can hold my 7 year old. A body that keeps breathing and a heart that keeps beating. I'm grateful for my soul. A soul that loves and cares for others. A soul that doesn't let me quit when my body thinks its tired. I am thankful for my mind. A mind that is not closed but feels enlightened when it questions the world around it. I am grateful for my dear friends who are there for me when I need them. Who love me regardless of what my weight was or is. Who love me no matter what my faith is or my political views. I am thankful for my savor and hope to try and live like him even though my short comings are not few. I feel so much gratitude for all that I have been blessed with in my life. Including the strength to rise from a dark pit in which I dug my self. I know this is not necessarily a weight loss post but in life when you see the positive you find happiness and contentment in your self. And that is part of what you must do to lose weight and keep it off.

The other half in moab!

This was my first half marathon! I say that as if I know for sure there will be more to come. I trained hard and worked hard and I did it! It was amazing. The course was extremely hard with miles of steep hills. But my goal was to not walk up any of those hills! AND I DID IT! There were times I had to talk to myself to keep my legs going. I am glad I kept going! I have experienced some hurtles to get to run this race so it seemed even that much more important to run it! I got tendinitis in my ankle and knee a week before and had to have my first run back besides a quick ten min on in the physical therapist office the MARATHON! I also have had runners trot during all my long runs so I was extremely scared of what was to come. I was so nervous and excited the night before and even the day of I had the worst butterflies waiting to go to the starting line. I remember the thought process well. I remember thinking am I sure I'm ready for this? Am I sure I can run this? I was terrified and then the race began and I was feeling good staying on pace and enjoying some very small hills think oh I could run like this forever. Then mile 7 came and the hills got steep and very long! I watched people fall back and start to walk! I thought oh I could just walk it would be OK but I struggled with the thought and decided no I WILL RUN THESE HILLS! I looked down to my feet on every hill not to be intimidated by the length of them. I also DID GET THE RUNNERS TROT by mile 8 and had to stop at every porta potty they had until the end! But I didn't quit running! My time was 2 hr 20 min 31 sec. I think I would have been faster if the trots hadn't made me stop! but still over all a great experience!

120 pounds gone baby!

So I have lost quite a bit of weight but there is one thing I would like to address. Sure I look better I feel better but I still have days where I feel HUGE! There is a mental battle you still have to face. Every day I take steps of letting go of bad views of myself but it dosent happen over night. I often think I have kicked the negative self talk in the butt to find my self slip into those bad habits. It gets easier to recongnize and to let go but you will always have those habits and you will always have to deaft the negative self talk.

Life gets busy!

Life is busy but we have to find ways to live our life while maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Work, school, Kids, vacations, Friends all are a part of our life. You can't avoid it and I don't think we want to, But fail proof your life. Always look at your goal and with each decision you choose think first is this choice going to help me obtain that goal or set me back and then go from there. If it is going to help you great! If it is going to set you back evaluate whether you are ok with that set back or not. If you are ok with it then choose it and move on. Its what we do most consistently that matters its not the one meal we ate to much at or the day we skipped a work out. Its what we did before that day and after that choice we made to do that.

Tips to fail proof your life.

1. Have a supply of healthy snacks in your car. So when you are busy running around and you get hungry you have something there that will keep you from stopping at McDonald's.

2. Have nutritional facts of your favorite places you stop at in your car when your on the go so that you can pull them out and make a better choice when you do eat out.

3. If someone asks you to go out to eat never say YOU DON'T CARE WHERE! You do care give them 3 suggestions of places you know there is something you enjoy and can eat.

4. Before going out look up the menu online and decide at home what you are going to eat before you even get there.

5.When going to a friends for dinner bring something! That way you know you can at least eat that.

6.Schedule your work outs! If you miss it find another time in that same day to do it.

7. Enjoy life! don't panic if you made a poor choice move on immediately and let it go.

Baked Chicken Chimichanga

1 pound chicken breast cooked and shredded
1 can fat free refried beans
1 16 oz jar salsa
8 oz fat free cheddar cheese
2 tbl per serving fat free sour cream(optional)
1/2 c chopped scallions
fresh cilantro to taste ( optional)
10 med whole wheat tortillas ( I use the whole wheat dunford because they are zero points)

Combined in a pan over med heat the chicken, beans, salsa , cheese and scallions. Heat until cheese has melted. Then using a measuring cup put 1/2 c of mixture in each tortilla folding to make sure all edges are enclosed. Spray pam on casserole dish and place chimichangas with fold down in pan. Bake at 350 degrees until shells are golden and crisp to with sour cream and cilantro and any other toppings you want. Each chimichanga is 4 points. Add additional point for other toppings.

My first Race! The wasatch womans love your body 10K

This race was amazing! It meant a lot to me! I would like to publicly thank all my fans who showed up to my race! My mom , Karen(my mother in law), Grandma Warner, Yannick( my brother) Ethan ( my brother) Erin, Cora , Eason, Brevan and I can't forget my hottie Matt. Also want to thank my other supporters who couldn't make it to the race but were there in heart, Jeannie and Neil and their family and all my good friends! I love you guys!

So I wanted to share my experience with you all. I have been training for a few races over the past few months. The Wasatch woman's love your body 10k was my first race! I was so excited for this race because it was my first and what it stood for. It was a charity race where it was raising money for girls with eating disorders and teen suicide and self esteem problems. It also stood for loving your body! Where most of you know through out my life I have never loved my body! I loathed it for years!( I might even say for 27 years lol) But I broke through that self hatred and learned to love my body! And by loving my body I take care of my body! This race was the perfect race to be my first.

The night before the race I felt like I did the night before I was going to be induced with my first child. I was excited and nervous and didn't know what to expect. I had been training for this for months but I was still scared. I thought what if I don't finish or what if the hills are so bad that I have to walk. The morning came fast and matt and I went down to sugar house park I had my number and all my gear (ipod, Knee braces, Powerade and fruit). The time seemed to fly by and there I was standing in the back of the crowed for the 10k race to start. I felt tears start to well up I wasn't sad I just couldn't believe that me Celeste was about to run 6.2 miles in a race. I started off in the back because I didn't want to feel bad if people passed me I wanted to do the passing. When he said go everyone started to take off some sprinted some walked and I just kept telling my self pace your self slow down if you need. I started to pass people and it felt amazing, not that it was about winning or losing it was just about my own personal success. There were a lot of hills in the run and I had run hills in training but not as many as there were in this run. I kept my pace and I was feeling amazing. Each mile was dedicated to a person or people I loved. And each mile had a meaning to me. As I ran each of those miles I tried to think about those people I dedicated them too. As I ran I noticed a lot of people stopping and walking and then running again. Which is fine but it was my goal to run the entire thing NO WALKING! When mile 4 came it was a big deal because mile 4 meant a lot to me but it also was the steepest hill in the entire race. I think that that hill was meant to be in mile 4 just for me. I have to say it was pretty ironic. Well all the woman I could see immediately in front of me started to walk up this hill. I again started to cry and a surge of empowerment hit me and I ran and I ran past those woman and As I came down I saw the sign Mile 5! I perked up and my speed increased and as I came along that last bend I saw my little brother and him smiling at me and the I just stated to sprint and I sprinted till I passed the finish line. I could hear my family screaming for me but I didn't see them I was so focused on sprinting. When I crossed the finish I was catching my breath and the lady who was helping take the timing chips off our shoes said you did awesome and then I started to ball and she asked are you ok. All I could say is I finished! It felt good to finish something I started. I have always been a person who starts things and has great ideas but doesn't finish them. BUT I FINISHED! I also Killed my average time! I don't know how I beat my time considering all those hills and the fact that I felt like I had to keep slowing my self down. But I ran it in one hour and 3 min and I thought I would do it in 1 hour and 15 min. (because of the hills) My average time with out hills would be 1 hour and 8 min.

Now I'm excited for my next race! Also Look for me in Wasatch woman's magazine. My story is going to be featured there!

Things I can't Believe I can do!

(these are the pics for 24 hour fitness!)

So besides the scale success I thought I would mention a few other victories! One I can run!!!!!!!!!Long distances! And I love it! Two my Blood pressure is 106 over 62! Three My resting heart rate is 58! I can do guy Pushups! In my entire life I have never been able to do that even when I was thin before. Four I have confidence. That one is a biggie. I have never had confidence. It is an amazing feeling to feel good about your self and not need as much out side aproval! I have learned that if you put your heart and mind in it you can achieve what ever you want. Over all I am a much happier person. I have gained my life back!

shepards pie

1 pound lean ground turkey
1 med onion diced
1 small package frozen pea's and carrots
1 can turkey gravy
3 tbl worchesier sauce
1 1/2 tsp garlic powder
3 cups mashed potatoes ( mashed with sour cream and fat free milk) (add oregano to potatoes)
1 cup fat free shredded cheddar cheese

Saute turkey and onions. Add worchesier sauce saute 2 min. Add carrots and peas and seasoning. Heat until carrots and peas are warm. Add gravy and coat meat and veggies evenly. Transfer meat to baking dish. Cover meat with mashed potatoes using a spatula. Top with cheese. Then Broil on low for 5 min until cheese is melted.

This serves 8 and is 7 points each serving. This is a recipe I made up. There are a lot of shepard pie recipes out there I just tried to make one low in fatand with veggies my family likes. So enjoy! I wrote down the calories a while ago to figure out the points but I need to do it again so I can post the exact calories.

One Huge mile stone!

So I did it I hit my 100 pounds! When I went into weigh in on saturday I was hoping for that 100 lbs buts was telling my self it will be ok if you dont hit it this week. Then I steped on the scale and saw what it said and I imediatly started to cry the leader turned to tell me and she saw me crying and she said you just gave me chills congratulations! I continued to cry a little off and on through out the meeting then they wanted me to talk and I couldn't. I had so much to say about this journey but could not speak because all that came out were words hidden in tears. I was not sad by any means I was overwhelmed by happiness and all sorts of emotion. I think of the girl I was a 100 pounds ago and i want to cry because I know how unhappy that girl was and how I thought then is so different than how I think now. If I could have a conversations with my self back then I would want to just hug that girl and tell her I love her. Tell her she has the strength inside her to achieve anything and that she does matter. 100 pounds seemed so hopeless and seemed impossible but its not! Im so glad I that I changed my thinking and that I believed in myself. I also want to thank my wonderful husband who never once said a unkind thing about my weight to me. He always told me he thought I was beautiful and when I would cry about something some one else said he would tell me why do you care what they think? I think your hot. Who could ask for a better husband in this situation than that. Thank you Matt for always trying to make me see me. I love you!

"But it dosent matter."

As you know it is hard to succeed at something if you have a negative attitude about it. You have to train your mind to see the positive in life so that you can see the positive in working out and choosing healthy food. This is a hard task to do because it is human nature to see the negative first. In the book the non runners marathon trainer it gave me some small tools to help me focus on the positive. My favorite its "But it doesn't matter." Try saying this after every negative thought and eventually you will start to see the brighter side in life. For instance, when you get up to go for your run or whatever and you feel that negative thought creep in,"I'm to tired." or "My legs are sore." "It's too early." Try adding But it doesn't matter to the end of those sentences. Then you will push through and do the work out any way and you will feel good about it after. You can use this in all aspects in life and you will see the positive person emerge. For instance ," I never really had a dad,(BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER).", "I have failed at other diets (BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER)." I don't have enough time (BUT IT DOESN"T MATTER). Also another trick I have found to push through the body aches when working out is to acknowledge the pain and move forward. I have bad knees and have had surgery on my left one and often I get pain in them when I'm running. Well after reading up on the type of pain I have it looks like I have runners knee so I do what is recommended and still run on it. The minute I feel the pain in my knees or one of them I say," There you are pain welcome come run with me." I know sounds silly but mentally it lessens my pain and sometimes it even goes away.

97 pounds gone for good!

Just a little update on how I'm doing. I went to my weigh in on Saturday and I'm 97 pounds down only 3 more till I hit the hundred I am so excited about that. Hard work pays off and I feel good! I am so glad I made this choice to become a healthier me! ( the picture was taken right be for a run)

The Vacation!

So when trying to lose weight and also live life we often go into panic mode when you think of vacations and what will you eat. You don't want to lock your self up in your house only eating meals you have prepared. I have experienced some amazing vacations in the last year and I can tell you that their will probably be gains but there are a few things to keep in mind. You don't want to just throw the towel in and say oh I'm on vacation. I mean you can, but if you do you might have a significant gain. When I went to Mexico I did that and came back with a ten pound gain! I got back on track immediately and it took about a month to get off. So first off try to keep track of what you are eating and make healthier choices. Allow your self some of the food you want while on vacation and know you chose that and DO NOT FEEL GUILTY! I did things a little different when I recently went on vacation to Las Vegas. I knew I was going to be in a car for a good portion of the day snacking and then eat out. So I got up at 6 am and got a run in. Then I picked some healthy snacks for the ride and tried to keep track of my calories when we went through the drive threw. Then that night I ate at the buffet and tried to pick things I really wanted to eat by walking threw it first. I even enjoyed desert. The next day I hit the gym. I got in a small work out nothing to big and enjoyed the food I ate that day. I indulged and tried not to over do it to bad. I came home and I didn't gain! I fully was allowing myself a 2 pound gain but by some small planning I didn't gain. So enjoy your vacations and just do some planning.

Spiced Pot Roast!

1. 2 pound beef bottom round roast trimmed



2. 1 tsp salt



3. 1/4 tsp freshly ground pepper



4. 2 tsp olive oil



5. 1 1/2 cups unsweetened apple cider



6. 1 cup dry red wine



7. 8 cloves garlic peeled



8. 2 star anise ( fennel stars)



9. 1 bay leaf



10. 4 medium white turnips peeled and each cut into 6 wedges



11. 3 carrots peeled and cut into 1 inch pieces



12. 3 medium red potatoes scrubbed and cut into 6 wedges



13. 2 onions each cut into 6 wedges

1 Preheat the oven to 350 F. Sprinkle the beef with the salt and pepper

2 Heat oil in a dutch oven over medium high heat. add the beef and brown turning frequently(about 8 min) then add cider and wine and scrap bits off the bottom of dutch oven. add the garlic , star anise, and bay leaf bring to boil . Cover and transfer to oven. Bake one hour turning halfway through.

3 stir in the rest of the ingredients and cover and bake for 2 more hours till veggies are tender. Transfer the beef to cutting board and let stand for 10 min. Then cut into 16 slices and serve with veggies and sauce.

serves 8 2 slices of beef with 1/2 cup veggies and sauce per serving. 332 cal 14g fat 5 g sat fat 4 grams fiber 23 grams protein 7 points!!!

We enjoyed this for dinner last night! My husband liked it but he said the potatoes tasted a little different! that's cuz he was eating the turnips! I laughed so hard shh what he doesn't know wont hurt him! I got this recipe from the weight watchers turn around cookbook!

Chewy Chocolate- Peanut Butter bars

1. 2/3 c extrachuncky natural peanut butter


2. 1 (14 ounce) can fat free sweetened condensed milk divided


3. 1 tsp vanilla extract, divided


4. 1 c semisweet chocolate chips

1. place peanut butter and 2/3 cup condensed milk in microwave for 2 1/2 min, then add 1/2 tsp vannilla and stir till smooth. then microwave for and additional 30 seconds. spread mix in a 8 x 8 inch pan pressing down to even the layer.

2. Put chocolate chips and the rest of condensed milk and vanilla in microwave for 1 1/2 min stir till smooth and pour over the peanut butter mix. Let chill for a hour.

serves 20 for 3 points each at 147 calories 6 grams fat 1 fiber

I found these to be small but sometimes a good thing when you just want a little chocolate and let the kids go at it.

Asian -Style Pork Medallions

1. 2 tsp dark sesame oil


2. 1/4 tsp crushed red pepper


3. 2 tsp bottled minced garlic


4. 1 (1-pound) lean pork tenderloin sliced into 1/2 inch thick slices


5. 1/4 c dry sherry


6. 1 tbl brown sugar


7. 3 tbl low sodium soy sauce

1. Heat oil in nonstick skillet over med-high heat. add red pepper and garlic and saute 1 min. Add pork, and cook 2 min on each side or until browned. Remove pork from pan, and keep warm.

2. Add sherry, brown sugar and soy sauce. Cook over med heat for 5 min or till sauce slightly thickens stirring constantly. Add pork to pan and cook unitl thoroughly heated, stirring to coat pork in sauce.

serves 4 ( 3 ounce servings)

4 points each at 167 calories 5.9 g fat 22 grams protien

I served it over a 1/2 cup white rice or brown and with roasted veggies that I added my olive oil to so the whole dinner was 8 points for me that included getting my daily serving of healthy oil. Plus it was really good!

91 lbs gone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So today I weighed in and was down 91 lbs! I'm very excited! The closer I get to my goal the harder it seems I have to work. Not that this has not been a hard journey anyway. You don't go into weight loss thinking oh this is going to be easy. We all know it takes a lot of work. I look back and remember how 100 lbs seemed so impossible. I was so discouraged by the amount of weight I wanted to lose. Now I only have 9 lbs till I hit that 100 pounds. I took it 5 lbs at a time. Also though it seems so hard whats harder? Is it having joint pains? Is it having to shop in the bigger stores and not feeling good about yourself. Or is it making healthy choices and improving you life. Believe me I think being overweight is harder than losing weight. Even though I'm not at my goal I feel better about myself and shopping is more fun and seeing my fitness improve is encouraging.

When you work around FOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

So I work in a restaurant most of you know. I am surrounded by yummy pies and french fries and and delicious unhealthy salads. This has been a struggle for me. I would find myself picking at the corn bread or croutons or what ever thinking oh one bite is not bad but then one turns into two and two turns into three and pretty soon I have had a whole piece. I would also end up using all my extra points while I was at work and not having any for the rest of the week. Which really stunk. So I committed to my self not to use all my extra point on the weekend. I got up each morning before work and planned everything I was going to eat while at work and stayed in my calories. I had bags of carrots and grapes and healthy snacks and brought my own salad dressing. So every time I would find myself being bored or go to the cornbread I would break out one of my snacks. I stayed satisfied the whole day! It was great! I also had all my extra points for the week to use how I wanted. My weight loss has improved and I feel more in control! So if you work and find your self so busy you run to a drive threw everyday or whatever. Make a plan, map out your days calories if you can fit that drive threw in and choose something healthy than do it if you can't make you meals a head of time so that they are easy and convenient and take no calculating because you have already planned it!

Things Beyond YOUR Control!

There are many things you can't control in life You can't control how other people treat you or how they view you. You can't control what a friend or family member serves at a party. You cant control the things other say or feel or think or do. You can control how you deal with them. You can choose to let others opinions affect you negatively or you can let them go. This is not easy to do but you are capable of doing it. I can control how I view myself and what I put in my body. If your having a get together at some one elses house bring some food you know you want to eat to share. That way you have a safety. Believe me no one will ever say you had to go home for bringing food or turn food away. They will say thank you and they won't know you were not really doing them a favor but helping your self. Also plan to indulge a little on rare occasions . If you have a get together coming up plan for it choose lower calorie meals the rest of the week. Obviously still keeping in your calorie budget you don't want to starve. Then when you get there decide what you are going to have or find out what they are having before you go so you have a plan. If you know your aunt Ida only makes red velvet cake on the 4th of July and that is the only time you will get it. Have it! Live and control your life don't let food or life control you! If you are hosting the party guess what you are in complete control. You can make what ever you like and no one has to know its lower in calories. Who ever said healthy food doesn't taste good is crazy there are so many yummy healthy recipes out there. Like for example roasted veggies with olive oil is so good it brings out the flavors of the vegetables. Grilled terriakye salmon or pineapple chicken. Do those sound gross to you? Actually most healthier recipes have way more flavor. Enjoy the summer fun!

American Potato salad

1. 2 lbs potatoes chopped, cooked and cooled
2. 2 lg hard boiled eggs
3. 2 tsp apple cider vinegar
4. 1/2 cup fat free plain greek yogurt
5. 1/2 c fat free mayo
6. 1 1/2 tsp splenda
7. 3 tbl sweet relish
8. 1/2 tsp salt
9. 1/2 tsp pepper
10. 1/2 c chopped celery
11. 1/3 c chopped red onion

In a large bowl mash one egg yolk with vinegar till smooth. Then add yogurt and mayo and mix chop the other egg and throw in the rest and coat potatoes . Refrigerate over night

serves 8 3/4 cup servings at 2 points each!

Bacon Potato salad

1. 1 1/2 lbs chopped and cooked red potatoes with peel
2. 3 slices cooked and crumbled turkey bacon
3. 1/4 cup low fat mayo
4. 2 tb red wine vinegar
5. 2 tb parsley chopped
6. 1/2 tsp salt
7. 1/2 tsp pepper
8. 1/2 c scallions chopped

Toss together and refridgrate over night! serves 4 3/4 cup servings at 4 points each!

It's not about being THIN or SKINNY!

It really bugs me when people say how does it feel to be getting skinny or thin. Or doesn't skinny feel better than anything! How about how does it feel to be healthy? I want to be healthy not skinny! Skinny often isn't healthy. I want to feel good and I don't want to fit in someone elses mold they feel fits for me. I'm happy making good life choices and being active! I am happy that if I want a certain food I can have it. I'm happy in my life. If being thinner comes with good health than fine but I'm going the healthy route. The active route. There are many skinny unhealthy people in this world with high cholesterol and high blood pressure. I choose not to be one of those. So eating healthy and exercise is my way of fighting heart disease and diabetes and all those others.

enjoy the moment you're in and take time for yourself

A lot of mothers and others often only look forward to the future. We say stuff like oh when I'm thinner or when my kids are older or when we make more money. We tend to never just sit and relax and enjoy the present. Sure we may not be to our ultimate goal but part of our goal is to be happy in life. We as parents always put our children first and yes this is a good thing to some extent, but when do we get to enjoy? It's not selfish to take time for yourself. We need it! Do something each day to better yourself as a person and that you like. Plan certain times you are going to do that and don't let others take that time from you. When kids are hassling you during that time you say , " Lets talk about that at this time and set a certain time." That way they no your not ignoring their needs and will get to them. Let them know that at this time its mom or dads time and you will be happy to help or do or talk about whatever it is they are needing. Once you set those boundaries eventually they will know and leave you alone during this time. You can even do this with friends and spouses. It will be strange to them and sort of a struggle at first because they are not use to you doing this, but its important to do this for yourself. Also like your self now! Stop looking to the future find a out fit or something that makes you feel attractive at what ever weight you are now! Feeling good about yourself helps you to be more positive and treat your self better. Yes you may not want to be the size or weight you're at but you are working on it and that is something to feel good about. Give your self praise! Every week look for a positive thing you did that is going to help you towards your weight loss goal! One week I did pretty badly I didn't track my food intake and I missed a lot of work outs and I even indulged on more than one of those days. But I can say hey I worked out this week! Which is a improvement to where I was 2 years ago so Yay Me! I want to leave this Quote with you its my new favorite quote! Being overweight is HARD! Losing weight is HARD! Maintaining your weight is HARD! Pick your HARD.

Grilled Havarti and avacado sandwhiches

1. 2 tsp healthy balance butter made from olive oil
2. 8 slices french bread 1/4th inch thick
3. 2 -4 tb apricot perserves, to taste
4. 4 ounces harvarti cheese sliced
5. 1 large avacado sliced

1. Heat non-stick skillet over medium heat. butter four bread slices on one side only. Grill with butterd side down first. On clean side of all bread put perserves to taste on then layer harvarti and avacado and top with other peice and butter out side and grill until cheese is melted.

307 cal 4 fiber 19 grams healthy fat!

really yummy 8 points

Affermations

This may sound silly but honestly has helped me with traing my thoughts and thinking positive. If you listen to your minds inner dialog what is it saying? Are you constantly beating your self up? Maybe not even about weight loss maybe its about your parenting or your job. Stop and really listen to the things you say to your self. Now ask your self would you say these things to some one you loved? Would you tell them they are fat and ugly or are terrible parents or why would you eat that. Would you call them stupid. Would you tell them they were failures for having fries instead of a side salad? Most likely no you wouldn't. If your loved one was on a diet and slipped up you would immediately say its OK and start again keep going. so why is it that we tell ourselves these horrible things? We need to love ourselves. This part I feel has been probably the hardest part of my weight loss journey. Its human nature to turn towards the negative . So you have to make a conscious decision to change your minds eye of yourself. This is much easier said than done, but it can be done and after awhile it gets easier. So about a year ago I wrote on strips of papers what I wanted to be or how I wanted to view my self and i posted them on my bathroom mirror. They say stuff like, " You have a strong healthy body", "You can do it," " You are beautiful," " You are ready for today's work out," " one day at a time," " You feel great." Those are just some of them. I have some inspiring quotes as well. While this maybe cheesy to you it can do wonders on the way you view yourself. Then start to recognize when you are self bashing and quickly start the positive self talk. When I started running I noticed all my negative thoughts. I would run and immediately start to think this is hard and I'm in pain and I cant do this. That's when i really recognized it so I started talking back in my head. I would say I am strong. I can do this. I can run all day. Those thoughts made me keep running where as before i would give up because I was telling my self you can't. Again would you tell your child when they are doing something challenging they can't? No, you say you can your awesome. So start treating yourself the same way you treat the others you love. Because YOU CAN YOU ARE AWESOME!

So you want to be a runner?

My whole life I have never really enjoyed running but I have always wanted to be good at it. It seems so empowering! So Healthy! I wanted to be a runner. I ran alot while I was dating in college. Then I got engaged and all I wanted to do was be with him so there was no time for running lol. My wonderful fiance would bring me great meals like Wendy's and McDonald's everyday! Take me out to eat to Outback and have those famous Cheese fries with bacon dipped in ranch mmmm lol, but what he didn't know was that he would never gain a pound and I would gain some for him and me. What a sweety he was taking care of me making sure I ate. In fact in college my daily routine was a root beer for breakfast and a bake potato for lunch with BBQ sauce or ranch and I depended on going out on dates for dinner. It worked pretty well. Needless to say there were a lot of guys getting led on while i was just depending on them for a meal. I know very mean but I was young and stupid and I didn't want to waste my money of food. I had plenty of other things to spend it on like clothes! So I quit running and didn't really start running again until now. I walked off and on and did exercise videos but I was not a runner.
I started running at the gym of and on walking and running. I felt like I was probably going to keel over and die. In fact I would stop myself thinking my heart would literally explode if I kept running. I have a goal I want to run one marathon in my life. My sister Rachel let me in on this book that helped me and now I can run. I am a runner! So here's what you do if you to want to become a runner!

week one: walk at a moderate pace (17 -20 min/ mile) for 30 min 3 times a week
week two: walk at moderate pace (17-20 min/ mile) for 30 min 4 times a week
week three: Fast walking pace (13 - 16 min/ mile) for 30 min 3 times a week
week four: fast waling pace (13- 16 min/ mile) for 45 min 4 times a week
week five: Jog for 5 min and then walk 5 min at fast pace. repeat 2times 3 days
a week total time 30 min.
week six: Jog for 10 min and then walk 5 min fast pace. repeat once. 3days a
week. total time 30 min.
week seven: Jog for 15 min and then walk at a fast pace 5 min. repeat once. 4 days
a week. total time 40 min.
week eight: Jog 20 min then walk at fast pace 5 min. repeat once. 4 days a week.
total time 50 min.
week nine: Jog 25 min and walk at a fast pace 5 min. 4 days a week total time 30 min
week ten: Jog 30 min. 4 days a week total time 30 min.

Now you are moving and you can work on your pace! This is what helped me. This information was courtesy of the non runners marathon trainer. Happy running!

Grilled Ginger Chicken with Pineapple and Coconut Rice

1. 1 can 20 oz pineapple rings in juice


2. 2/3 c uncooked white rice


3. 1/2c unsweetened coconut (found in health food stores)


4. 4 boneless skinless chicken breast (1 lb)


5. 1 Tbl soy sauce


6. 1 tsp ground ginger

First drain juice from pineapple into measuring cup. Reserve 2 tbl of juice in another bowl. Then combined the remaining pineapple juice with enough water to equal 2 cups. Place rice and coconut in medium sauce pan and heat stirring until golden brown or lightly toasted. Add the water and juice mix to rice and bring to boil. Cover and let cook on low for about 15 min or until all liquid is absorbed. While rice is cooking combined the chicken , reserved juice, soy sauce and ginger in a bowl and toss well. Then grill or broil till chicken is cooked and place pineapple rings on grill. Then serve over the coconut rice.

I got this recipe from weight watchers. I added a Tbl of terriakye sauce and I used fresh ginger and grated about a teaspoon into the sauce. It was a big hit! My husband loved it and he is a picky picky eater! Its only 6 points and its really yummy! Serves 4

Excuses

We all have them. They help us to rationalize what we are doing to our bodies to make it easier to digest why we give up on ourselves. We all have reasons . I would say I gain weight easier than others. I have to work out harder than other people in order to lose weight or maintain. My hormones make me gain weight easily. I'm to tired or I'm tired all the time. Now I say SO WHAT!
Why all these reasons and excuses may be true and this may be the hand you were dealt. Your skinny friend maybe able to eat a whole large pizza and never gain a pound while you on the other hand might just look at it and gain two. The thing is what do you do with the hand you were dealt? Do you quickly fold or do you play the game? When you choose to play the game you learn ,you have fun , and you enjoy life. When you fold you sit on the sidelines watching others play being bored, beating up yourself, being unhappy and not living. So I choose to play.

100 reasons

In the beginning it can be very challenging to keep motivated. You have to decide where you want to go and what you want to achieve. In vision a happy you doing something that makes you happy. What do you look like? What are you wearing? Who are you with? What are you doing? Now keep that vision and decide what you have to do in order to get there. My weight watchers leader gave me some advice. She told me to write down 100 reasons I wanted to lose weight. The first 20 were easy. I wanted to look good but after that I had to really dig deep. It took me a while to find a hundred but I found them. Keep that list of reasons and break it out when you feel less motivated or get comfortable where you are if you are not at your goal. I look at those from time to time and say that's right I want this and it gives me a little extra umph to get through. Also having a support system is important. I'm not say go out and join weight watchers although I fully support weight watchers in what it has done for me but I am saying have some one you trust you can share your challenges with. Someone who wont judge you and understands. Some one you feel comfortable telling how much you weigh to and if you gain or lose. When you are accountable you tend to think twice about eating something you shouldn't. Being accountable does not mean your support person needs to make you feel badly about it. This person should never make you feel bad about your choices they are only there to be your support. They should know you will most likely beat yourself up over it and do not need anyone else doing so. I do hope you will not beat your self up over the choices you make but we all do. You will eventually learn to move on. I say yep I ate that but I'm either going to work out extra today or I'm just going to let it go and start back on track immediately. Not tomorrow or next week but immediately. Your support person should be your cheerleader when things go right and your shoulder when things go wrong. I know from personal experience that when I don't have a source of accountability and support I don't do well.

Have a great day and do one thing each day you can be proud of whether it be part of your weight loss goals or just in life.

A Beautiful Life

Love yourself.

Make peace with who you are

And where you are

At this moment in time.

Listen to your heart.

If you can't hear what it's saying

In this noisy world,

Make time for yourself.

Enjoy your own company.

Let your mind wander among the stars.

Try.

Take chances.

Make mistakes.

Life can be messy

and confusing at times.

But it's also full of surprises.

The next rock in your path

Might be a stepping-stone.

Be happy.

When you don't have what you want,

Want what you have.

Make do.

That's a well-kept secret of contentment.

There aren't any shortcuts to tomorrow.

You have to make your own way.

To know where you're going

Is only part of it.

You need to know where you've been, too.

And if you ever get lost, don't worry.

The people who love you will find you.

Count on it.

Life isn't days and years.

It's what you do with the time

And with all the goodness and grace

That's inside you.

Make a beautiful life.....

The kind of life you deserve.

A few tips that have helped me!

First off you need to have some sort of food journal whether it be the weight watchers one or a piece of paper and pin. Keep track of every thing you put in your mouth even water. This will let you know exactly what you are putting in your body! I would sometimes find myself thinking I have done this for a while now I can tally this in my mind. I often end up making catastrophic errors and it always shows on the scale when I don't journal my food intake. Second measure your portions. Sometimes I eyeball it and usually find out I ate a extra 1/2 portion. The portions tend to creep up on you again.
Second get moving you burn twice as many calories standing as you do sitting. So if you don't have a regular routine just make small goals. I don't recommend going out and working out four 2 to 4 hours your first day exercising. You wont be able to maintain that for long and the minute you don't follow through with that you will feel failure and want to give up. So make small goals that you can easily obtain and help build your confidence in yourself. Then you can bump those goals up a notch slowly. Never set your self up to fail. By saying in going to lose 4 pounds this week if you lose 3.5 you did not reach your goal even though that's a great number will still make you feel less happy with your self but if you say I'm going to walk 15 min every day for 5 days and then lose 3.5 you will be happy. Also never reward yourself with food. You are changing your lifestyle so there is no reason not to fit in a favorite food every once in a while. All you need to do is plan.
Planning is the key to success in all aspects of life. Plan a certain time you are going to work out. plan meals out plan ahead and have guilt free snacks in your car for when you are starving and on the road and passing a McDonald's. Plan what you are going to eat before you get to the restaurant to meet a friend that way you wont be tempted to just order the bacon burger with fries. Many restaurants have nutrition facts on there websites visit there before you leave the house.
Find ways to make your favorite food healthier like using fat free cheese or fat free cream of chicken soup.

chicken pesto with whole wheat pasta

So I made a twist on the original pesto sauce we are used to. To make it less fatty so the main thing is i used less olive oil and more flavor!

1. 12 0z whole wheat pasta cooked



2. 2 boneless skinless chicken breast cubed and cooked



3. 3/4 c parmsean cheese



4. 2 cups packed basil leaves



5. 3 tbl pine nuts



6. 2 tbl olive oil



7. 2 cloves garlic crushed



8. 1/4 tsp salt



9. 2 tbl water

In a food processor combined basil, oil, pine nuts, garlic, salt, water and blend. Then add 1/2 cup parmesan cheese and puree. Toss with noodles and chicken over low heat top with remaing parmsean cheese and serve

serves 6 and is 7 points and is 366 calories 12 g fat 3 sat fat 5 g fiber 25 protien

even my kids loved this Thats what we had for dinner tonight!

mexican potatoe soup

1. 1 large bakeing potatoe peeled and cubed
2. 2 c fat free half and half
3. 1 cup corn kernels
4. 1/2 small red bell pepper, finely chopped
5. 2tsp minced jalapeno seeded and deveined
6. 1/2 cup water 1tsp chillie poweder
7. 1 1/2 tsp ground cumin
8. 1 cup fresh chopped cilantro
9. salt and pepper to taste
10. tabasco to taste

In medium saucepan combine all ingredients except cilantro. simmer covers until potatoes are done about 15 to 20 min and cilantro and serve.

This is 3 points a 1 cup serving serves four

Park city stew

1. 1 pound lean beef stew meat
2. 5 med potatoes cubed
3. 5 carrots sliced
4. 1 bay leaf
5. 1 pkg dry onion soup mix (lipton)
6. 1 can cream of celery soup
7. 1 can cream of mushroom soup
8. 2 cans 8 oz of tomatoe soup

Combined in crock pot. Cook on low for 6 -8 hours or 4 to 5 on high stir occaionally

7 points serves six has 380 cal 5 grams fiber 7 fat

Crock pot chicken salsa

1. 4 boneless skinless chicken breast about 2 pounds
2. 1/2 pkg chicken taco seasoning
3. 1 c pace salsa
4. 1/4 c fat free sour cream
5. 1 can black beans

Spray crock pot with pam add chicken and seasoning top with sour cream and then salsa. layer in order. cook on low for 6 hrs shred with fork and serve over brown rice or chips or make a salad or burrito.

5 points a serving and it serves 6 if you leave out black beans its only 2 points a serving. I never wrote down the calories while cooking so I will have to do that the next time I make this.

Caribbean Taco Salad

1. 1 20 oz package Jennie O ground turkey extra lean
2. 1 pkg taco seasoning
3. 2 tbl water
4. 1 c mangos, chopped
5. 3/4 c chopped red bell pepper
6. 3 tbl chopped green onion
7. 3 tbl chopped cilantro
8. 1 tsp greated lime peel
9. 2 c spinach leaves

Taco shell

4 ( 8 to 10 inch) whole wheat

tortillas

1 tsp olive

Preheat oven to 425

Brush both sides of olive oil on tortilla shell and place on custard bowls and bake for 4 to 6 min or until golden brown.

Brown turkey add taco seasoning and water cook over low heat for 3 to 5 min.

In bowl stir together mango, red pepper, green onion, cilantro and lime.

put meat in shell and top with mango mix and enjoy.

This servers four people and is 6 points a serving. It has 305 calories 4 grams fat 37 grams protien 34 carbs and 9 grams fiber. I cant remeber where I got this recipe but I think I got it from the trainer Bob on the biggest loser during a show! But its really tasty!

Thin Crust whole wheat Pizza dough!

1. 
   
   2/3 c warm water


2. 
   
   2 tbl honey


3. 
   
   2 packets fast acting dry yeast


4. 
   
   2 1/2 c whole wheat flour


5. 
   
   4 tbl ground flax seeds


6. 
   
   1 tsp salt


7. 
   
   1 tbl cornmeal


8. 
   
   non-stick cooking spray

This make 2 thin crust's

Mix water, honey and dry yeast let sit for 5 to 10 min while you prepare flour. In seprate bowl mix flax seed, 2 cups of flour and salt. Then add the flour mix to the yeast mix using a spoon till it forms a ball. Then use hands and knead on a floured surface ( using remaining flour) for about 2 min. Spray a bowl with cooking spray and place the dough in oven loosely coverd with a cup of hot water. Let rise for 20 to 30 min. Seperate into 2 equal halfs and roll using dusted rolling pin thin sprinkle cornmeal on dough and flip dough on to pizza pan with cornmeal facing side down. Strech dough on to pan. I dough gets holes pinch them back together. Top with your favorite topping and bake.

Bake at 375 for 10 -15 min

I like to use fat free cheese like the weight watchers cheese. I also us the heart healthy traditional prego for the sauce or barbacue or a light ranch. Also some of our family favorite toppings are turkey pepperoni( though my husband thinks its the real pepperoni) Canadian bacon and pineapple of course and my favorite chicken, artichokes, mushrooms ,bell peppers and sundried tomatoes. This dough makes about 8 slices on each pizza and the serving size for the dough its self is 2 slices at 195 calories a slice 4 grams of fat and 6 grams of fiber and 3 grams of protien which make that 3 point per dough serving. Or if you use fat free cheese and any of the topping combos I have listed 2 points a slice give or take a point depending on how heavy you top them!

Hope you enjoy this is one of my kids favorite!

"The beginning of a life long Journey"

First off I want to start off saying thank you to my friends and family who have been very supportive. Also a special thanks to Jeannie Warner who has been on me to start this blog. I love you Jeannie and thanks for being such a great friend to me. My weight has gone up and down my entire life but I was never really over weight till after my first child. God bless the mothers a endless thankless job most of the time . I did the typical firt time mommy thing stayed in sweats most of the time and was lucky to get a chance to even get a shower in. I focused on making sure my baby looked cute and was well taken care of. Which is a good thing but there needs to be balance in all things. I got depressed off in on and I struggled with self loathing most my life never likeing what I saw in the mirror and not listening to people when they complimented me. I would often say thank you and laugh and some how put my self down. I remeber my mother telling me I was beautiful at a very younge age and saying what ever you have to say that your my mother. Sad thing is I truely believed that. So how does some one who basically hates them selves and treats them self that way get freed of that self hatred and retrain themselves to think more positively? It takes one small step at a time! It does not happen over night! I know you have heard this before but its true THERE IS NO MAGIC PILL and if you dont change the way you think you will most likely fail at every atempted of weightloss! I dont say that to sound mean its just the facts. Believe me I am one of those people who have tried numerous diets and lost some and gained more back. I was not motivated when I started this in January 2008. In fact I had told my self I had to lose 10 pounds before joining weight watchers because I was to humiliated to get on the scale. Which is funny to me you have to lose weight before joining weight watchers? In December 2007 I had reached a all time high and avoided going to family functions I didnt want to let people see me. I cried almost on a daily basis for a few weeks and then decided to go to a lap band seminar. I felt this was my last hope. I even told my husband I hope your ok with this because I will probably never lose wieght and will always be fat. In my head I was a failure. Some people made comments and even a some family about my weight which would send me into a spiriling downward depression where all I wanted to do was run to the fridge and cry and pitty myself. I kept telling myself how much I hated me how much I was disgusted with myself. Believe me I didnt need anyone to point out my weight I did it every day.
Even in highschool when I was not fat I would tell myself I was. I had hated myself for many years. I look back at pictures and laught and think gee I thought I was fat and ugly man I wish I could have enjoyed life more. There was even a point when I refused to get on a plane and visit family because I was afraid the stewartess would have to give me a extender. I kept saying I wanted to go to disneyland or a theme park but really didnt because I was scared they would tell me sorry you are to big you cant ride this ride or the safety restraints wouldnt fit. So here I was paralysed by my weight not living life and hating myself but I woke up on January 8th 2008 and threw clothes on and told my husband Im going to weight watchers. I didnt really want to go in fact I was not even motivated that it would work this time. I just thought I'll go and maybe something will change and maybe the motivation would come. I was so nervous that morning i remember even being tempted to turn around and forget about it. I kept saying you dont have to be embarrased you can just go home no one will ever even know. But for some reason I didnt. I went in to sign up and I was so scared. When the ladies there looked at me I thought for sure they are judging me. Thats what I had trained myself to think. I thought anyone who looked at me was looking at how fat I was but agian I pushed through got on the scale to see I was even heavier then I thought. Agian I started to self hate. I took the books they gave me and just followed the plan. I was kind of like a robot just doing the motions never really getting excited. the first week came I had only lost 2 pounds while thinner girls were losing 4 or 5 or even 7 pounds. The self pitty hit agian. I pushed through and did the motions another week again 1.5 pounds. I thought what on earth this stinks. Did it another week and 2 pounds again. This week i was not upset I decided it didnt matter I was going down and thats ok. I continued to go down and there were weeks that I didnt lose anything or even gained but I would quickly push out the negative thought and say its ok im on my way. I dont care how long it takes me anymore Im doing this for my health and me and thats all that matters. I have through the power of affirmations retrianed my brain to see more positively and this is a challenge I face everyday. The minute I can't comes in my brain I have a war with my thoughts and say oh yes I can and im strong and I can do it! So my posts are going to be about the struggles I have faced the ones I still face and how to get through them . I will also post my favorite recipes and new ones I make up. So for those of you embarking on a weight loss journey of your own just know YOU CAN DO THIS! I know you can I have and am still doing it. We fall we get back up and thats ok!